What is a death doula?
A death doula, also known as an end-of-life doula, is a care provider for people who are dying, and for their families and closest circle. But what does that mean? Let’s get into it.
When your’e facing a life-ending diagnosis, navigating the field of death care can be daunting. You’re dealing with paperwork, doctors, nurses, sometimes social workers, sometimes hospice, distraught friends and family, plus your own fears and concerns. It can be incredibly stressful and the worries over things undone or left unsaid can become buried under that avalanche.
As death doulas, our aim is to help you. We will guide you through the murky and wild waters. What we may do, if you ask:
We can assist with paperwork and phone calls.
We’ll speak confidentially with your family, your doctors, and your circle of closest friends.
We will work with your medical team as advocates and we’ll make sure you have clarity in your prognosis and care.
We’ll sit with you at bedside in whatever manner you require on any given day. Maybe that means quiet time. Or guided visualization. Or soul-searching conversation. Or crafting. Or laughter and reflection. We are there as a neutral third party to help you explore your heart & mind in confidentiality and without judgment.
We will help you with legacy projects & memorial or after-death planning.
We’ll help you create and enforce your bedside vigil plans, ensuring you can meet the end of your life as you wish.
MAiD and VSED assistance and support is provided by a number of doulas, to help you die with dignity and comfort. (Doulas are non-medical and do not prescribe the medications, however.) Our role is to work with your team, answer questions, address concerns, facilitate your wishes for your environment in your final days, and guide the process on the date you choose.
Do all doulas provide all the same services? In a word - no. The truth is, there are as many types of doulas as there are clients. Some of us provide comprehensive care, as above. Some specialize in just legacy projects or legal aid. Some doulas work with animals rather than humans. Here at Pacific Death Doula Collaborative, we aim to match clients with the doula who will fit their needs best. You are encouraged to visit our listed doulas’ websites so you can decide for yourself - but if you are overwhelmed, you may always simply get in touch via our contact page and we’ll help you match with the doula you need.
A death doula can mean the difference between chaotic stress and an easeful death. We operate like your own personal buoy so that we can be a calming presence in your turbulence, keeping you above the waves, and helping you float. If a doula helps you get through your paperwork, navigate relations, and address your worry, it creates the space you need to relax and transition on your terms and as you decide. It is our honor to do so. ~m
