
Why are we so weird about death? Bringing death more visibly into the cultural fold.
Let’s face it—the American death culture is dysfunctional. Just this month I attended a wellness event in Los Angeles where Bryan Johnson, founder of Don’t Die, promised his eager audience that biological aging and dying are outright unnecessary. It’s as if acknowledging mortality is an act of treason against the preferred “live forever” mindset.
When death does arrive, it’s too often treated like a medical failure with its spiritual significance neglected. American funerals are traditionally somber, hurried affairs of dry-eyed propriety, with the deceased cremated or tucked away in a sealed coffin. There’s little room for lingering, grieving, or celebrating the life that was. Contrast this with other countries, where death is woven into the fabric of life.

Intercultural Communication as a Tenet of Care
In service at the end of life, at a time of great vulnerability and tenderness, a Death Doula exercises a deep awareness of cultural differences and the competency to adapt when needed. We can encounter differences in perception, values, communication styles, and norms.

What is a vigil plan?
When a person is dying they will experience a period of time when they are “actively dying”. This refers to the time when the person’s body begins to shut down and they have begun the process of transitioning into death. It is not uncommon for this to last for many hours, several days, and in some cases even longer. During this time the person is often in and out of consciousness or unresponsive. This is the opportunity for you and your family hold a vigil. A death doula can help this process go smoothly, from planning and for the duration of the vigil.